Stress

I'm back from RC playing L4D2 with Isaac Chong Qi Ann.

Last year this day, wasn't playing any lan shop games at all. One year later, look back at all that has happened. Look where i was, and look now where am i now. I was going to somewhere, but now i'm going towards nowhere. Great life i have.
I can only conclude i'm a wimp, a weak.

It has been a year. ONE WHOLE FREAKING YEAR.
Going on four month, still not getting my muthdafucking life back.

I'm sick of pretending that it doesn't matter and i'm going on living like i don't give a heck. I'm very bothered and is still heartbroken over my tragic incident, so stop telling me i'm weird or i've changed alot, be it good or bad, i don't wish to hear. Please be a kind soul and redeem yourself from sinning any further, refraining from talking sense into me, or tell me not to think of it cause apparently it's not working. I've given up finding my right life or rather my normal self back again. Be a dear and stand at one corner and let me whine if not lend me your shoulder to cry on, quit telling me to get a life cause he won't come back, i'm waiting for nothing. I know he is not but i simply love deceiving myself, living in the past, hoping for things that i know i can't get and will never get back again, my own will. HAPPY NOW?

Fuck you la, but i still love you. You're an asswiping great harsh impact on my suppose to be dramatic but not going to the wrong direction all the way but now all screwed up life. Thank you very much, love you very much too, LWX.

Will try to blog real soon, when i've more spare time. Been hectic, imma coughing out blood. Literally. No time for anything else 'cept work, L4D, Starbucks, Doodlejump, work, L4D, Starbucks and Doodlejump. tyvm. I'm in great debt ):

Will not treat every twenty-eighth as zheyang's birth day. Super make use substitute max. Sorry Chia, but i still remember your birthday. October baby freak you ass.

once again.

♥
I better grab hold of what i still have now,
let go of what has already been lost.

Face it. I bawled my eyes.
Stupid song speaks so much for me.



Time to pack up my emotions and deal the upcoming weekend properly.
Three months has been long gone.
Please, i can do it. I really can, i think.

nocturnal beast

Who told you one is enough?


Crashed Coffeebean with Brenda at WCP.
Then Holland V for Starbucks chill.

Fml. Can't get enough of it.
So much caffeine, imma turning into a nocturnal beast soon.


Still can't get Babybo out this terrible nightmare.
Whycantisufferalone.knnf.

My sweet tooth, your funny bone

Met terence for dinner at Ma Maison. Me tummy was already shouting for food way before ordering. Only a vegetarian zheyang can work with the aroma and not get hungry.

My curry rice with chicken culet


Terence's large hamburger steak


Lightings over dinner time was contributed mostly from candles and dim orangey light, nice ambiance but supa lousy quality photos, blame it on iPhone. Not bad food, will go back some time again but probably over lunchtime.

After dinner, daily dose of coffee :D


hello, we are a bunch of Apple product freaks. We spam iPhone and iTouch games all the way through. Apple makes us happy people, tyvm.




I refuse to say this, but i'm already 19 years and exact 1 month today. Fml.

Caffeine Enslavement

Been craving for coffee and chocolate pretty much recently. Without the daily dose, i fidget and i feel restless. Depite still coughing, it didn't stop me from cutting down on the sinful drinks. Curiously, i googled if cocoa was even addictive.

Chocolate contains cannabinoid, this particular chemical produces euphoria caused by marijuana use. Theoretically a person can get a high after chocolate eating, but he/she must eat more than 10 kilos of this product to achieve it. They define chocoholia as a condition when a person feels a lack of control around chocolate and chocolate endorphins that change our mood for better.

Read it for yourself here.

I was born a fan of chocolate, but i'm now a slave of it. Hooked onto it like some drug addict. Digged. Unfortunate for my pockets, now i'm not only working for school fees, part of the money goes to coffee chillazx sessions. Great. Am really looking forward to tuesday for more The Soup Spoon, Starbucks and cheesecake. And of course, this weekend for i don't know what is planned. What a wonderful week this is.


8/1: Had my virgin taste of The Soup Spoon. Definitely going back there and try out all of the soups. They serve orgasmic rad soup and smoked salmon sandwich, total worth the bucks.




9/1: Touring around singapore on foot.





We even attempted doing the jump shots at the rooftop garden.
starting the most successful shot,




to the totally failed one.


I ended my day with a cup of Double Chocolate from Coffeebean, as usual, and i super long talk with Brenda. Feels so good, laughing after so long.

Vamoose

♥
how does it feel,
not being able to there anymore?

Haven't been blogged a proper post since the new year. I haven't been summarising up my 2009 or given a proper thought of my 2010 aspects yet, and more than one week of the hopeful brand new year has flown by.

2009, the year i ever felt so loved. Throughout my eighteen years of life, my first time ever spending valentine's day with a boyf not a friend. Experience many 'first time's, ups and downs. Learnt so much about army life and terms, so proud of my self-learning abilities. Had the best good times and the worst bad times, including getting a huge fugly scar. Lesson taken and learnt. Thank you. Thank you for letting me believe there's such happiness around. Thank you for making me stronger going through all the bad.

Shocking twisted birthday this year. People who was initially suppose to celebrate went missing, people who didn't plan to celebrate turned up with the most touching gift. Oh well, it's the last teen birthday, imma getting old not really a good idea to celebrate birthdays anymore.

Met fresh faces towards the end of the year. Mad bunch of people making me feel relinquished and so young again. Awesomely stunned by extreme energy able to stay up til wee hours after laughing the whole day out. Lovely, my laughing bones make me feel young i guess?

For the new year ahead, i guess it's time to learn how to move on. I need a sense of direction, i need someone else to be there. I hear love birds chirping on friends around me, i ought to feel happy for them but i feel selfish and awfully jealous. Is this the monster that has grown in me and brought forward along with me for the new year? If it is, great. How to fucking move on with muthafucker.

Rush

3/1: BBQ at nicole's place. Another day of drinking, red faces, half drunk people. Had fun eating cancerous food, boiling teriyaki chicken, bbq marshy and wings eating on the spot.





Say hello with the signature minirock!


Had tons of fun, went back home smelly, oily, sweaty, sticky, weary. Erm girls, i think it's best for us to meet up at Seoul Garden the next time.


4/1: Another pretty last mintue but was planned quite some time ago movie treat.



I suppose everyone has already watched it, shall save on my personal reviews. If you haven't watch it, then go watch cause you are slow, slower than the usually slow Josephine Tan. Watch it online or rent the DVD or in the theatres or whatever.

Will blog again real soon, xo.

My Brand New Start

Happy Twenty-Ten people!

31/12: Went out as glory early with Brenda to rot and welcome the brand new year with wide opened arms.

We tried to decompose ourselves at Starbucks with Iced Chocolate and the signature minirock,


Shopped and found this pair of gold high cut at Adidas,


Chio punk studded side and back


And to reward ourselves for working with the fresh food people, we bought a new wallet as to welcome the brand new year ahead. Okay, bullshit, there was sales.


01/01: Went out to boring JP to have dinner.

Thank you Mister Nice, love my new friend called Paul Frank.


Starbucks for dessert and supper. And i guess it was my fourth day having coffee. To compensate my lost of not able to sink my teeth into an Oreo cheesecake, i got a slice too.


I think there wouldn't be another idiot as dumb as me to buy people a whole cheesecake taking a bus. Oh well, was already broke after buying the cake so cabbing back home wasn't possible. At least now i don't feel so much of a dope, cause evidently, there wasn't any sort of celebration or bullshit planned at all. Thank you, thank you.

Bai! Before i get too emolish and weep the rest of the day away, happy happy new year once again,

(: xo